Tour Day

Today we got up and had a not so lovely breakfast, plenty to choose from, but not really wanting salad and fried rice for breakfast. So after a lovely breakfast with my sister, Andrea and Michael, fellow travelers we started our day of touring. First, we went to the Cloisonne Factory and had a little time to do some shopping. Then we went to the Great Wall. Unfortunately, it rained all day and was foggy so pictures at the Wall were not that great. It was still amazing to see. After we got all wet we went for a rickshaw ride on the Houtong tour. My sister and I felt kind of bad for the little man that got the pleasure of pedaling us through the 200 year old city. We sat and laughed and were in tears wondering what he was saying and if he was having a hard time since he was about 90 pounds soaking wet. Good times, one we will never forget! On the way to Tian'anmen Square we stopped at the Olympic Village and saw the Water Cube and Bird's Nest. We then proceeded to Tian'anmen Square. Joy, our tour guide, saw that most of us had fallen asleep and asked if we wanted to stop and take pictures, we all said NO! It was already 4pm and we are exhausted, some of the families had just arrived at 1am that day. So we gladly skipped the Square. The way home was a nightmare, the traffic was horrific. I can't remember it being so bad in 2005 when I was here last. It was bumper to bumper and crazy! It took us till 7pm just to get back by our hotel and then we got stuck again and decided to get off the bus and walk the rest of the way. No lunch break so we were all tired and starving! We would like to thank Pizza Hut for delivering to the hotel, it was pretty good! And the funny thing is when we went down to get our pizza, there was a guy from McDonald's there delivering too. He rides a moped and a helmet with an M on it, lol!!! Pretty funny to see. Now we are relaxing and watching Mall Cop on HBO and yes it is in English too! We have to get up early and fly to Guangzhou tomorrow. Sunday is Gotcha Day!!!!! For those that don't know Gotcha Day is the day you receive your child. I can't wait for Sunday! One more day baby girl and you will have your Forever Family!

Ni Hao from China

Rice sold in bulk

Some type of snack..liked the panda!
Chimene and I preparing for the long flight!

Ni hao! We have safely made it to China. The flight was long, but standing in the line at Immigration was horrible. I don't think they have discovered air conditioning anywhere in the airport. It was so warm, sweat was running down us. Lovely! Our flight was nice, we watched several movies and met fellow members of our group on the plane and other families adopting too. We discovered that on the flight we were sitting next to Marbeth Kipp, she judges dog shows and has judged at the West Minister Dog Show. Very nice lady to chat with. The ride to our hotel was a little scary at times too. The drive crazy here, cutting over and stopping on a dime, wow! The hotel is nice, but the beds are like two plywood boards..NICE! Gotta love it! Hopefully the beds at the White Swan are a little bit softer. After we got settled and hugged everyone I have been emailing in our group, we ventured out as a group to the grocery store for water and snacks. I can only imagine what the Chinese were thinking as we walked in a row with our umbrella's due to the rain. I saw a few smiles, laughs and finger points in our direction. I took a few pics at the store and it is just how I remembered it. Tomorrow is going to be a long day for us all. We are leaving for touring at 8am and won't be returning to our hotel until 6pm with no lunch break! Glad we brought snacks with us. I can't believe I am here...it is still surreal for me and for a few other soon to be mom's. Going to take some Tyelnol PM now and try and get some sleep. Big day ahead of us!

China Bound!

I can't believe the day is finally here! It is still surreal for me, maybe stepping on the plane a little later this morning will make it finally sink in. I am sad to leave my loved ones behind, but soon they will have a new great granddaughter, granddaughter, niece, and cousin! I am going to be a mom in just a few short days, OMG...a MOM! I have prayed for this for so long and now it is finally becoming reality and no longer just a dream. I am blessed. Thank you Mom and Dad for helping me along this journey, soon you will have your first granddaughter to love. Chimene, thank you for coming with me on this journey. You are a wonderful mother and I am blessed to have you with me. Brian, thank you for taking care of my babies at home...be good to them and I expect 2 cats there when I get home! And thank you for being my rock these last few weeks too. I am gonna just go with the flow and enjoy every minute good or bad and the next post will be from China!

A little bit about Emily

I just realized that I never really posted Emily's referral info, so I thought what better time to do it than 3 days before I travel to China. Emily's Chinese name is Pan Xinjuan. Xin means "everything takes on a completely new look" and Juan means "new hope". Some of you may know that throughout this adoption I have used the word hope as my mantra. So the meaning of her name is perfect. Pan is her last name. Pan is her last name because she is at the Social Welfare Institute of Panyu District of Guangzhou City. Emily was found at gate No. 7, North Tanfang Street in Dalong Village, Shiji Town at 8:30pm on Nov. 26, 2007 and she was sent to the orphanage the same day. She was examined and weighed 2.5kg and was diagnosed with cleft lip and palate. They decided that her birthday was 10/26/07. Cleft lip and palate is known to be a birth defect due to lack of folic acid during pregnancy. Fortunately, Emily has had her lip and palate repaired. I was quite surprised that they repaired her palate, China does not usually do that surgery there. She may and probably will still need to have some surgeries as she grows, but we will face that as it comes. Emily has normal development, but due to being in an orphanage she will be behind a normal 3 year old for a while. They said that Emily is clever but shy. When others talk about her she covers her face with her hands and that her shy looks make her look lovely. She likes to play with her caretakers and her favorite toy is a plush doll. She loves music and likes to sing to it too. How could my daughter not love music, her mommy loves to bust out in song all the time. She knows simple monosyllabic words in Chinese such as dad (baba), mom(mama), sister(mei mei) and brother(jei jei). Emily is very obedient and quiet so her caretakers like her very much. That's my girl in a nutshell! I can't wait to meet her, only 3 more days until we travel and one week until I get my baby girl!

Travel Invitation!

I was so excited to see the UPS man drive up yesterday while my mom, Kara and I were setting up for my garage sale. I received my travel invitation for China, one of the last steps in my adoption. Funny, I was excited, shaky and almost in tears when I saw him pull up. I just can't believe that in 6 days I will be getting on a plane with my sister and my life will be changed forever.

I never planned my life to turn out this way. I never thought that I would be 38, single and childless. You dream of marrying your soul mate and having kids by age 38. That just wasn't what God had planned for me. I have had a lot of learning experiences in my life that have only made me a stronger woman, that is why when I turned 35, I decided to start the adoption process. I knew that if I wasn't married, I still wanted to have a child and I wanted to have a little girl. I have 3 nephews that I love dearly, but it was time for some dresses, bows and Barbies in the Kozlowski family. I have always had a fascination with the Asian culture and I knew that if I adopted I could have my little princess. After much prayer and thought I started the process in January 2006. I attended an adoption meeting at Bethany Christian Services and after watching a video of a family adopting their little girl, I was in tears and knew that this is the plan God had for me. I was all excited to start the process only to find out that since I was single, I would have to wait until there were some many couples wanting to adopt from China before I could start. Disappointment set in! I waited 8 months and at the end of August 2006, I received the call that I could start paperchasing. Paperchasing is a term they use in adoption because you have so many documents to fill out and a ton of paperwork to do and it can take months to complete. Two weeks after I started the process my Social worker, Sarah, called and said that there are rumors that China was going to change their requirements for adoption and singles were no longer going to be able to adopt. What? Seriously? Fortunately, Sarah told me that I would have to get my paperwork and dossier into China by December 2006. Wow, that was only a couple months away and I had a ton of stuff to do. So the chase began...I did complete my paperwork and sent off my dossier to China and was logged into the official system on December 14, 2006. I had made the January cutoff date, whew!!!! They did extend the deadline into 2007, but I am so glad that I raced around and drove to Grand Rapids to be fingerprinted and drove to Lansing for the official seals for my dossier. I wouldn't have changed a minute of it. So now the wait began. In 2006/07 the healthy adoption program was moving along nicely and it took about 8 months to a year to receive a referral for a child. (A referral is a biography on a child, where they were found, the weight and measurements, their personality and their daily routine. You then get to review the referral with pictures of that child and decide if that child is a right fit for your family.) The process was moving and then....it started to slow down. Months passed and then a year and then 2 years and no referral. People kept asking when I was getting my child and I didn't know. Why was it taking so long? Good question. China has a one child policy because of their huge population, but after the earthquake many families lost their child and were allowed to have another. The following year the Olympics were in Beijing which halted the process even further. Ugh, the emotional roller coaster! I decided to change to Special Needs and increase my age range to 4 years old. I only wanted mild SN (special need). I began to receive referrals, but sadly had to decline them because they just weren't the right fit for me. On June 22, 2010 I received a referral for Pan Xinjuan. I had no red flags and no what if's...she was my daughter, my Emily! Praise God! Since my referral everything has been going along pretty smoothly and I am leaving in 6 days. I have been communicating with members of our travel group and can't wait to meet them and their children. I have heard that we will be traveling with 12 other families, can't wait!

New pictures of Emily!

My Thursday was not shaping up to be a good day. I went to the bank to find out that the lady had already order money for the next week and I would have to wait another week to get my new money for China. She told me it would be here on the 14th of September and we will leave on the 15th...WHAT?!?! Seriously, what ifs started running through my head and panic set in. I called Brian and he told me to relax it would all work out. The bank lady did tell me that it WILL be here no question, but what will the condition of the bills be...who knows! After coming home from that experience I wanted to check out facebook and play around on the computer a while and what do you know...it won't start. Come on, this isn't happening! Not my laptop that I want to take to China with me. UGH!!! So I took that in and he said he would look at and call me the next day...well that was Thursday and it is now Saturday and no call....COME ON! Talk about stressing out. My friends have been wonderful in offering their laptops and I love them for suggesting it, but I just wouldn't feel comfortable. Thanks though Hil! So I am praying that all will work out and in the worst case I get a new computer, I guess. So when that all died down, I decided to go on my Mac upstairs and opened my email and saw an email from my Social worker, Sarah with a file attached...OMG, could it be?!?!?!?! Tears of joy streamed down my face when I saw new pics of my baby girl staring back at me. She is so beautiful. I am wondering if she is with a foster family and not in the orphanage which would be wonderful. Thank you God for answering my prayers and letting me see my darling Emily again before we meet. I didn't get a weight or height, but I did get a daily routine and the satisfaction of knowing that she is being taken good care of and doing alright from the pics. God is good. 11 more days and off to China, God is definitely good!

Overcome with emotions

This morning I woke up and found myself overcome with emotion. The tears are following and I am emotionally and physically exhausted today. The last few days I have been physically tired in the mid to late afternoon and I am not sure what that is all about, but probably my body is telling me that I need sleep. My mind races every night with lists of things to do and what I need to get done before I go. I want things to be perfect and am learning that it always isn't going to turn out that way. Thankfully, Brian is keeping me grounded and reminding his "OCD" girl that everything is going to work out fine. Also thought it might be the Hep A shot that I got yesterday at the doctors office for the trip. One thing is for sure with all the stress I was worried what my blood pressure was going to be and holy cow, it was really good...110/70!!! That was a shocker, but relieved to know it isn't sky high for the trip.

Today though I think the reality of it all is sinking in. I have waited so long for this little girl and in 13 days I will be flying to China to meet her and bring her home. It is stressful trying to make sure you have everything you need for the trip. The paperwork is the most important and I need to sit down and review it all again just for peace of mind. If I forget to pack something that will be ok, but I definitely need to have all my paperwork and money together and correct. That leads to todays venture...I am going to the bank to order money for China. For the adoption I will need to give the orphanage a sizable donation and it all has to be in cash. Brand new bills or close to it, no wrinkles, no pen marks, and no folds!!! They have to be perfect, GREAT! So I am going to order money today and then have to meticulously look through it when it arrives to make sure it will be acceptable for the Chinese government. No stress there, geez!!!! I will keep you all posted of this venture soon.